So, I’ve not written for a long time. I don’t know if you are asking, “Why?”, but I can tell you that I am not certain myself. Honestly, I don’t know if I was a little tired of sharing my life with everyone even more than normal, or if I have been trying to work several big issues out for myself, or what? Perhaps I just got lazy on this matter. That would be pretty unusual for me, but not out of the question.
The new “normal” continues to erode my existence in some ways, while galvanizing it in others. Despite all the thousands of prayers from “normal” Christians like me, or “healers” who have crossed our path, Gail’s illness continues. She still has terminal metastatic pancreatic cancer that is being held at bay by a chemotherapy regimen which also has the potential to have life threatening side effects. This therapy will eventually lose its’ effectiveness unless some new therapy is discovered. Had she not taken this therapy, as some suggested, she would have been gone several months ago. God indeed infuses His crowning creation with many marvelous abilities, whether it is to design a beautiful structure, paint a beautiful image, sing a beautiful song, or discover a life-enhancing therapy. According to His Word, all of these gifts, and many others, are equally as important to our present existence, and should be celebrated in the same measure.
Approximately 151,600 people on earth die each and every day of the year. No amount of prayers or gifted healers are stemming that tide. Some of those folks are well along in years, while many others are killed or murdered in some kind of conflict, starve to death, die from some kind of accident, or experience a terminal illness – many of which are preventable. This is reality... the one Jesus fully indicated would continue until His final return. Anyone who teaches differently is deceived, or ignorant of Jesus' teaching. If all the healers in the world gathered and invited all the sick, addicted, abused and those about to be murdered, to their side, there would still be about 151,600 deaths in the world every day.
Well, thank you Pastor Don, that was refreshing!
Now, can we move on to dealing with reality? Of course, we can. Your prayers have allowed Gail to do what so many cancer patients are unable to do. She walks several miles each week. How many of you walk several miles each week? :) She takes care of business matters. She comforts others in need. She inspires hundreds of people to keep trusting and following God, no matter what. She raises funds that will eventually result in saving thousands upon thousands of people in southern Asia from their sins, and help raise their communities from poverty in the process.
(see - www.gailsgirls.org) She inspires our church family to keep trusting and following God no matter what. She takes care of her daughters, her grandson, and her husband every week. And today, she mowed our lawn! (About this, I am not too happy, but this is something she has always loved to do.) Yes, your prayers are bearing fruit, though it is not yet the fruit we all ultimately desire.
I’m trying to explain a bit of my life. Some of you who have been caregivers for those with serious illnesses know from whence I speak. My existence swings from joy that the marker numbers were good, or “down,” to “they went up this week.” This is difficult. I truly wish I was some kind of “rock” of faith and endurance, but I struggle every day. It hurts to see my wife drop a butter dish top because she cannot feel through her fingers. It hurts when she spends most of a day in tears. It hurts when she warms her ice-cold hands against my skin.
But, I refuse to curse my God because life happens. I refuse to curse God because things, “big things,” do not go my way. He has told us the truth about this life and He personally demonstrated this truth by suffering and dying on a cross for my foolishness. I don’t understand what is happening. I don’t like what is happening. But I am immensely glad that He warned me about these matters and promised me that He would never, ever, leave or forsake me. So far, He has kept His promise.